I love folding towels…
I love folding towels. Our evenings often end with the kids in bed and the two of us, folding clothes.
I walk into our room and look a this giant pile of MESS and freak out a little inside. I look at all the socks and the kids little shirts and other balled up d0-dads and stress out. See, with ADD a person is already a walking ball of chaos and when that chaos walks into more chaos, well there lies the ADD infinite loop of insanity. I quickly scan the pile for ANY sense of order or pattern and every time this search starts with…the towels. Towels are uniform, easy to spot and big!
With ADD I look for any way to calm the raging storm in my head. This can be as silly as looking for all the towels in a pile of “to be folded” clothes, listening to classical music, cleaning up my night stand or any other means I can find to reduce the chaos. The irony is though…I am the cause of 98% of my chaos, I am the storm that causes the storm.
I am 35 years old and it has taken me this long to figure these and other “systems” for dealing with this thing called ADD. Anyone that has a deficiency, yes that includes you, has developed ways and methods of coping and even overcoming their “issues”.
What are some ways you have learned to deal or function in areas of life where you fall short?
(Check out Sarah’s Blog for her thoughts on living with this weirdo and his ADD!!)
20 responses to "I love folding towels…"
I feel your pain, came to visit for your lovely wife’s site. I am the ADD spouse also, and I know it must drive my husband crazy. My ways of dealing with it is schedules, I have to have my day broken down into tiny chunks that I can think about, do, and mark off. If I look at the whole day and all that has to be done, I will flake–go back to bed, go to the mall, create more mess by starting a new project, you name it–but definately flake out. My days and weeks are very much the same beacuse this is were I can cope and if you didn’t see me write it down, just know I have no idea about it, I have to write everything down. Thanks for sharing, you are an encouragement.
God Bless,
Cha Cha
I will always fold the socks and underwear for you. i promise.
i love you.
I know, and you always offer
Isn’t that interesting/funny….I love to fold towels, too. I hate folding anything else. And I have A.D.D. I just never saw the connection! Thanks for sharing, Chad.
My darling brother, God has brought us through different journey’s and some are later than we would like. I am blessed to hear the comedy and sincerity as you work these things out by the grace of God.
However,it is safe to say that the ADD gene skipped this sibling 
I like folding towels as well. I see them in the same light as you described
Love you
You certainly DON’T have ADD but you have your own share of “Markley” crazy!
love you kid
do i have a.d.d.? the person your writing about sounds like me, “a walking ball of chaos.”
i’ve learned to give myself grace. in fact i repeat it to myself daily “give it grace,” when looking at that pile of laundry. “give it grace” when the kids are too loud (which can be too much when you yourself are in chaos). “give it grace” when things and people don’t fall into place as i’d envisioned. and slowly i’m learning to breath, wait, and let grace reside in those places.
Uhh, do you have ADD?! Are you serious? In the dictionary under ADD, right next to my picture is your picture!
It’s hard to step back in the moment and get perspective but I need to do it more often than I do. Great reminder, thank you
It is amazing me to what God puts in front of us, in the very moment we need it.
I can strangely relate to your words. To the words your wife used to describe you.
I am a mom to two boys, and our house is always just as you described- chaos. Your statement, “See, with ADD a person is already a walking ball of chaos and when that chaos walks into more chaos, well there lies the ADD infinite loop of insanity,” makes perfect sense to me…
I too reach for the towels first when folding laundry…
Wow. My mom always told me that she thought I had ADD, and I now completely believe her. Seriously, I was just having a conversation with my husband about how I really *need* him to commit to doing one chore always, because even though we both work full-time, and he’s in school almost full-time, and I do expect to do most of the household chores, when I walk into our home after work and see that everything still needs attention, I just *can’t* deal, and so I do nothing. I then feel terrible and lazy, but it’s more that I’m overwhelmed with having to do everything and not knowing where to start and worrying that I’ll do the wrong thing. This is seriously wonderful and amazing to get your perspective on this!
Thanks!
I can totally relate to this. Like others on here, I didn’t make the connection until I read this though. One of the ways I have found to cope is this: If I’m cleaning a room and find something that needs to go to another room, I make a “to go in another room” pile in the room I’m currently in. If I take the item to the other room right away, I’ll see something in the other room and get distracted. Then nothing gets finished. So I wait until I have finished cleaning the room I started with and then take the stuff to other rooms.
Also lists are a must as others have mentioned. Speaking of others, am I the only other guy that reads your blog and has ADD? Or the only one to comment.
Have a great weekend.
I’ve never been officially diagnosed with ADD, but my oldest son has been. Seeing how it is hereditary, and I have many of the characteristics of ADD adult, I can say that I probably have some degree of ADD.
I also prefer to fold towels and jeans (both big and simple to deal with). I prefer to focus on one task at a time. I have to finish that one task before trying to start another. If I interrupt the first task, it’s likely it won’t get done, or it will get severely delayed.
I use my email inbox to manage tasks mostly. I even send myself emails so I’ll remember (gmail multiple inboxes help with this. Emails that are tasks get an action label, and go into a to do inbox). Time sensitive stuff I’ll put on my calendar so my phone will remind me.
If I find myself getting too distracted at work, I’ll put headphones on with some music or some white noise so I can tune out the chaos.
Did you find that at different times the ADD was worse than others? Like you had days you struggled more than others?
Even with medication (currently taking Vyvanse, works great) I find there are days when the ADD rages and it’s almost impossible to keep it under control! I love “The Album Leaf” for work music and I find it helps on days like we are talking about.
It is all about “systems” and doing what works for you. I also can’t put enough emphasis on the power of the Holy Spirit to reign our lousy “flesh” in and keep it under control. We won’t be rid of our short comings until we are home with Christ, but until then we can have limited success that give Christ glory!!
Hey Chad, thanks for sharing! I am popping over from Sarah’s blog…
I have never been diagnosed with ADD but have always had the sneaking suspicion that I have a small case. Honestly, I do not fold my underwear – ever. 99% of the time my dear hubby folds all the laundry but if I get my hands in it, I grab my underwear and shove them into my drawer. However, towels I can do. I never thought of these things tying into ADD though, very interesting.
chad i luv you u decribe “us” ADD/ADHD folk perfectly as a 19 goning on 20 yr old girl i some time feel like the odd duck in the family…. but i know i just see stuff differently like u i was on meds as a child but got off intill about a year agoand im happy to say it gives me just and edge to hold on to stop the chatter box in my head as far as rembering stuff my mother has been making lists 4 me since i could read ! soo thats what i do!
I am married to a man with ADD, and i love him so much but it is frustrating. But i loved hearing your side of it. My husband has a hard time explaining it to me, in fact he has never been able to. Thanks for giving me a look into his mind through yours.
Chad,
I love that you guys are talking about this issue. I get it from Sarah’s prospective since my husband has it too. I couldn’t really figure out why I can relate so well to you and to him until I took the little quiz you posted. I scored borderline. So, maybe the Lord has allowed me to experience just enough to have compassion and understanding towards it. Thanks for sharing!
Hey Chad!
I’m over here via Sarah’s page. This post is something that I can totally identify with. Although I am not married yet, I still deal with this on a daily basis. I think I’m still coming to terms with it, and realizing that it will be there for the rest of my life. I thought I could just ignore it, and move on with my life. Now that I think about it, I’m really doing myself a disservice by not changing the way I do things. I think that the situation kind of overwhelms me. Go figure right? I know that it affects me, but the steps to make it better? no idea. I’ve been told my whole life that I’m lazy, slow, unmotivated, you name it. I’m sure you’ve heard all of those and then some. I’m tired of living my life, and trying to ignore something that is completely part of me. Just some thoughts that I had after reading the conversations you and your wife are having about it. I don’t want this to negatively affect my marriage down the road. I want to be able to work it out with my spouse, and for us to be on the same page, and to be able to work together. I feel the want to make this better, and to try and make my life better. All I hear is all of the stuff I heard growing up, all the way through high school. Why won’t you do your homework? Lazy? Unmotivated? Stupid? Anyway, I feel like my thoughts are very jumbled. I’m just beginning to re-think this now, after having stuffed it. I’m glad you are having this conversation though. It’s something that I need to deal with. It’s a part of me for sure.
I can identify with you and Sarah completely on the ADD. Since my wife has gone on medication it is a different relationship and so much for the better. Keep up the blogs.
thanks for sharing the little things in the life of ADD and please continue to share. Your perspective is helping me see life through my spouse’s eyes. It can help me understand my spouse’s perspective a bit better, help me be more understanding, and help me not go completely insane. thanks.